Rules Rule! (Part 1)

You're probably confused about some of the newest rules and maybe some of the newest bullshit here at WAHS, but I'll try to shed some light on the hollow emptiness that school creates in your brain with an all new two part series, Featuring the F word!

1. New ID Policy: ID's must be worn around the neck at all times. If you, like me, are one who is inclined to follow rules no matter how retarded they may be, this one is for you. The explanation for this policy is fairly obvious. A lanyard is a simple choking device that can be accessed at any time for any reason by any staff member, which when used, will easily make a student comply with directions. Choke a friend! Choke an enemy! Together we can all help make this rule not only fun, but also functional.

Fashion Alert: Wearing a lanyard is perfect if you're going for that all out douchebag look, and even if you forget your lanyard and ID, they'll give you a sticker that has douchebag written all over it.


2. Hall Pass: The limitations set on the school facilities with this Pass has quickly created a black market for school services. The word in the halls is that you can get a freshly forged hall pass for about 10 cigarettes or two for 18 . These hard bargains are a small price to pay in comparison to the costs if the principals here would ever decide to limit other regular body functions (breathing for example).